Overcoming the lasting effects of any kind of trauma can be difficult. But, complex trauma is often more of a challenge because of the tangled web it can weave within your mind.
Complex trauma is usually caused by consistent, ongoing traumatic experiences. It’s most often found through things like childhood abuse or neglect but can occur at any time. For example, if you’re in an emotionally or physically abusive relationship for several years, you might experience complex trauma that’s difficult to work through on your own.
When you experience complex trauma at any age, it can completely destroy your ability to trust or even feel safe. You might always feel like you have to be on edge, you are more hypervigilant, and you might have a hard time opening up or truly being yourself around others in an effort to protect yourself.
Healing from complex trauma can be a challenge, but it is possible. Let’s take a closer look at some of those challenges, and how you can overcome them.
Difficulty with Relationships
Life is built on the relationships we have with other people. We all need support, and we all need people in our corner who help us get through things.
When you’ve been through complex trauma, it’s difficult to foster healthy relationships because you’re dealing with a strong sense of mistrust and even disillusionment. The betrayal you experienced from someone who was supposed to care for you, whether it was in childhood or a previous relationship, can stick with you when you look at others. So, even if someone wants to help you or be there for you, you might have a difficult time trusting them.
Unfortunately, that lack of trust can impact the way you see yourself, too. You might question your own thoughts and ideas, developing a sense of mistrust for your innermost feelings. That can lead to low self-esteem, low self-worth, a belief of self-blame, and potentially make you more susceptible to other forms of trauma or abuse.
An Inability to Relax
Being a victim of complex trauma can make you hyper-vigilant. While there’s nothing wrong with paying attention to your surroundings, it’s different when you live in constant fear of something “bad” happening.
When you’re always on edge or always waiting for the next negative thing to occur, you’re never truly able to relax. That can lead to other mental health conditions like depression or anxiety, and make it difficult to take care of yourself.
Lack of Vulnerability
Even if you have people in your life who you do trust and you’re grateful for a support system, that doesn’t mean it’s easy to open up and truly be yourself.
People with complex trauma often have a hard time showing vulnerability. They’re worried about getting hurt again. So, they keep themselves closed off as a defense mechanism. That only locks your trauma inside, so it’s much more difficult to overcome it.
What Can You Do?
No matter what you experienced or how long ago it was, there are strategies you can use to overcome these challenges and finally heal from complex trauma.
Keep in mind that it takes time, effort, and even feeling uncomfortable while you process the negative experiences. Complex trauma doesn’t occur overnight, and it’s not something that’s going to go away quickly. But if you’re willing to put in the work with a trusted professional and believe that you can move forward, it can happen.
The best way to start your healing journey is to work with a skilled mental health professional. A therapist can help you better understand the core of your trauma and the symptoms that occur. You can use that starting point as the first step of your journey. Therapy can also help you learn how to manage day-to-day symptoms. Practices like mindfulness, journaling, meditation, and self-care are all wonderful for the healing process. They can be done along with therapy to remind you that your past trauma doesn’t need to define who you are today or in the future.
Reach out tour Onyx office and let us support you on your healing journey.
