There’s been an unfortunate stigma around couples counseling for years. Some people believe it’s a last-ditch effort to salvage a relationship. Other people believe it’s a sign of weakness or mistrust. If there’s a stereotype to be found, couples therapy has likely fallen under its umbrella.
Unfortunately, these stigmas and stereotypes have led to a variety of misconceptions about couples therapy. Those misconceptions might end up turning people away from the idea of going to therapy with their partners, even if it could help.
You don’t need to wait until your relationship is “falling apart” to benefit from couples therapy. If you’ve considered it before but you’re still on the fence because of some things you’ve heard, it’s time to clear up some common misconceptions.
Myth: Couples Therapy Is Only for Couples About to End Their Relationship
Again, you don’t need to be in crisis mode to attend couples therapy. While it can certainly help if you feel like your relationship is struggling, that’s not the only reason to seek out help. In reality, there are a variety of reasons why people go to couples therapy, and so many benefits your relationship can experience, even when you’re already in a good place.
This type of therapy can improve your communication efforts. It can help you overcome personal hurdles or stressful situations you’re facing together. It can even improve your sex life, or how you parent your kids together.
Because there are so many sides to couples therapy, it’s not always just about “fixing” a broken relationship. Rather, it’s a fantastic way to strengthen what you already have and to be proactive about your partnership.
Myth: Your Therapist Will Take Sides
Couples therapy isn’t meant to be used as a competition to determine who is right or wrong in a relationship. Your therapist isn’t there to be a referee, and if you want them to take your side over your partner’s, you’re going to be disappointed.
Of course, if one partner is doing something that might be damaging the relationship, that will come out. But therapy isn’t meant to be the blame game, and it isn’t a way for you to prove you’re right about certain things.
Your therapist’s job is to help you communicate with each other more effectively. You’ll learn to see and hear each other’s perspectives, and take care of your relationship even when times are difficult.
Myth: Your Relationship Will Always Be Better After Couples Therapy
Therapy isn’t a quick fix or a cure-all for your relationship. While you might want things to work out between you and your partner, but going to couples therapy doesn’t guarantee it. Problems are also not solved after one or two sessions.
Instead, you’ll focus on your personal goals and the goals of your relationship. You’ll learn more about your values and your partner’s values and whether they’ll ever really be able to line up.
Most importantly, if you decide to end your relationship, you’ll be able to do so with respect and compassion rather thanwithcontempt and frustration. By the timeyou’redonewith couples therapy, you shouldn’t feel like a failure if it didn’t give you the result you originally wanted.Rather, you should have a better idea of your needs, wants, and goals for the future, whether that’s with your partner or not.
Is Couples Therapy Right for You?
Don’t give in to the misconceptions you might have heard about couples therapy. No matter where you are in your relationship, working with a therapist to improve communication and strengthen your bond is never a bad idea.
If you’re still uncertain about whether this is the right move for your relationship, the best thing you can do is try. Work with a therapist you’re comfortable with and go into the process as open as possible.
At Onyx, we have several skilled an experienced couples therapists available. Couples therapy is in high demand, so don’t want until crisis arises. Spots for couple therapy can be limited because they book up quickly. Reach out to our office to explore available options.
