No one wants to feel rejected, especially when they’re in a relationship with someone they love. Feeling judged or turned away by your partner can be especially hurtful. But, for someone with rejection sensitivity, those feelings can be even more extreme.
Rejection sensitivity is a characteristic that causes someone to feel rejection more easily and more strongly than others. Often, someone dealing with rejection sensitivity can take small negative social cues and turn them into something much worse — and even unrealistic. It can cause extreme sadness, anger, anxiety, or even physical pain.
Relationships aren’t always perfect. But rejection sensitivity can easily throw a wrench in an otherwise healthy partnership. So, what can you do to manage your feelings and your symptoms?
Be Kind to Yourself
Self-compassion can go a long way when dealing with rejection sensitivity. Your emotions are valid no matter the situation, so don’t put yourself down or self-criticize just because they might seem extreme.
Do what you can to practice self-care on a daily basis. Get enough sleep, stay physically active, write in a journal, and do things to alleviate stress. Things like mindfulness and meditation can keep you grounded in the present and make it less likely for your mind to wander.
Self-care can help to keep you calm and offer you a new perspective if you’re experiencing feelings of rejection. You can use that perspective to take a step back and think about your response before taking action.
Communicate with Your Partner
If you know you have rejection sensitivity issues, one of the best things you can do is make sure your partner knows about it.
Communication is important in every relationship. But, by sharing your feelings and needs with your partner, there will be less room for confusion and misunderstandings in your relationship.
Healthy communication will also help you set boundaries. When your partner has a clear framework of the things you need and the things to avoid, your relationship is more likely to run smoothly. Of course, it’s essential to listen to their boundaries, too. Making sure you’re both respectful of each other’s boundaries will create more peace within your partnership.
Be Patient
The intensity of rejection sensitivity can fluctuate. Do what you can to become more aware of your symptoms and triggers. Be patient with yourself and try to recognize that your feelings can become more severe when you’re dealing with something particularly difficult. It’s a good rule of thumb to let your partner know that, too.
Your symptoms can fluctuate. The more transparent you are about that, the easier it will be for your partner to support you and show you extra patience and care during difficult times.
Build Support
Speaking of support, don’t hesitate to surround yourself with people who will lift you up. Your partner is a great start, but make sure others in your life understand your feelings, as well.
The stronger your support network, the easier it will be to silence thoughts of doubt, rejection, and even fear. While it’s not always easy to openly talk about rejection sensitivity, the more vulnerable you are about your feelings, the better.
Finally, don’t hesitate to talk to a licenced professional. Therapy is a great way to learn how to effectively manage rejection sensitivity in your everyday life. If it’s affecting your relationship and you need help balancing your emotions, don’t feel like you have to do it on your own.
Not only can therapy help you manage your symptoms, but it can help you dig deeper into where your rejection sensitivity might have started. If you’re ready to take control, feel free to contact our office, Onyx counselling and Psychology, for more information or to set up an appointment.
